


How to Stop an Exploding Man

by sartiebodyshots



Category: Falling Skies
Genre: Episode: s05e06, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-06
Updated: 2015-08-06
Packaged: 2018-04-13 06:30:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 874
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4511481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sartiebodyshots/pseuds/sartiebodyshots
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ben wakes up to find his dad sitting next to him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How to Stop an Exploding Man

Ben wakes up, aware of someone sitting next to him.  He’s facing whoever it is, unfortunately.  There’s a hand on his shoulder, pressing just so, and Ben knows that the someone is Dad.  He wonders if Dad will leave if he pretends to be asleep. 

The hand moves from his shoulder to his cheek, the back of it stroking gently.  It reminds him of how things used to be.

“My sweet little boy,” Dad murmurs tenderly.  “I love you so much.”

Ben opens his eyes despite himself. 

“Ben,” Dad says.  His voice is full of contentment.  His voice is full of surety.  Because Hal and Matt always caused problems for him, but not Ben.  He’s always been his sweet little boy, and Ben knows it.

“Dad,” Ben says.  

“It’s good to see you again.  I had worried that I never would,” Dad says.

“Why didn’t you tell us Pope took Hal?  Someone could have been killing our brother, and you didn’t tell me or Matt,” Ben says. 

Dad puts on his comforting face.  It’s so familiar, but it’s stopped working.  “I didn’t want you and Matt to get dragged into this.  You guys are still kids.”

Ben laughs a little despite himself.  “We’re not kids.”

“What?  Of course you are,” Dad says.

“Matt has killed a man.  He’s watched his friends die.  He’s thought that he’s an orphan more times than I can count.  He’s sown up his friends and family,” Ben says, heedless of the hurt on his dad’s face.  “He’s not a kid.  Or at least he shouldn’t be treated like one.”

“Ben, he’s still a little kid, no matter what he’s been through,” Dad says.

“No,” Ben says, turning so his back is to Dad.  He doesn’t want to talk to anyone.

“You’re all always going to be my little boys, Ben.  An alien war can’t change that,” Dad says.

“You still tortured me,” Ben says, voice empty.  “And that’s okay.  That’s okay.  But you didn’t check on me after.  You’ve barely looked at me.  And you didn’t even tell me when my brother got kidnapped.”

“Ben, I’m sorry, and I understand if you’re mad-“

“I’m not mad.  I don’t feel anything anymore,” Ben says. 

“Ben, don’t say that.  Of course you do,” Dad says, touching shoulder again. 

Mom is dead.  Jimmy is dead.  Lexi is dead.  Deni is dead.  All of his friends are dead; almost everyone he’s ever cared about is dead.  Dad tortured him.  Hal hates him.  Maggie can’t look at him.  Something undetermined is wrong with Matt, and Ben can tell because Matt hasn’t tried to blow anything up or cause any trouble recently.  Someone tried to kill Hal.  He is the only spiked kid left alive that he knows of.  He felt part of himself get torn apart and tossed aside today.  Part of him die. 

Even if he understands why Maggie had to do it, it doesn’t make those three spikes any less dead. 

“If I started feeling mad or sad or hate like I used to, I would never stop and I would go insane.  You would probably have to, like, put me down,” Ben says calmly.  “It’s okay, Dad.”

He looks up to see Dad shaking his head, clearly about to cry, so Ben sits up.  Wrapping his arms around his father, Ben pulls him close as he starts to shake so Dad doesn’t explode and breakdown.  He remembers doing this when Mom was sick, comforting Dad while he cried. 

It’s funny, because Mom getting cancer and then getting cancer again was supposed to be the worst thing that ever happened to them.  She used to joke that they could use it in their college essays. 

“You’re going to be okay, Dad,” Ben assures him.  His heart isn’t in it like it used to be- there used to be love involved.  Love for Dad.  But Ben can’t even feel that.  It’s irrelevant, though, because Ben still knows what to do.  “I’m okay, Hal is okay, Matt is… here.  You’re going to be okay.” 

“The three of you are the whole point,” Dad says, voice gummy.  “I don’t care if the world survives or not, as long as you three do.”

“We’re all alive.  You’ve kept us alive, Dad.”  Ben presses Dad’s head a little closer to his chest, shifting so his ear is over his heart.  “That sound is because of you.”

“It’s not enough,” Dad says, leaning on him. 

Ben presses his lips to the back of his dad’s head.  “It has to be.  Come on, Dad.  We’re getting through a lousy situation together.”

Dad sniffs and nods against his chest before looking up on him.  “You’re right.”  His breathing is unsteady. 

Ben blinks slowly and sees Dad’s face go back to his calm, more neutral expression.  “I love you, Dad.”  And the lie isn’t bitter because he knows it’s necessary and he knows he’ll mean it once he can feel things again.  If that time comes.

“I love you, too,” Dad says.  “And I’m so sorry.”

Ben nods and hugs him tight.  “You did what you had to.  I understand.”

When Dad eventually leaves, Ben lays back down and pretends to be asleep again.  He doesn’t know what else to do.


End file.
